A commentary on Ephesians, chapter one; and restrooms, stalls one and two

 Commentary on Ephesians, chapter 1  and Restrooms stalls 1 & 2 

from our near-flung correspondent François Farce

This is the kind of town I live in, redder than blue in a purple state. The tweet doesn’t really tell the story. More accurately: an argument about Paul’s letter to the Ephesians broke out between two stalls in the women’s faculty toilet at a Christian school in the county, so just outside of town. The women emerged from the stalls, and violence – at least slapping and hair-pulling – ensued.

     At issue was the twenty-first verse of chapter one, where the Apostle claims that God has seated Christ at his right hand in heaven “far above all rule and authority, power and dominion, and every name that is invoked, not only in the present age but also in the one to come” (NIV) and what that meant now that Ted Cruz had dropped out of the race for the Republican nomination for President of the United States. Of America, to whom we pledge allegiance, “one nation, under God.” Stall one maintained that “being that Hillary and Trump were basically the only ones left,” the present age had better turn into the age to come, when Christ would come down and destroy the powers and the dominions, or we were . . . and she used the f-word, past participle.

     Stall two exploded and said not only was that kind of language unacceptable to her but it showed how far under the powers and dominions stall one had already come, especially considering that Jerry Falwell Jr. no less had endorsed Trump. Stall one repeated the f-word in conjunction with Falwell Jr.’s name (present imperative) that, she went on, showed how far stall two was under the powers and dominions since she thought it was above every name but one and that one wasn’t Jesus’ but Falwell Sr.’s, which made her an idolater.

     Stall two invited stall one to “step outside,” meaning of her stall. She did. Both did. More angry and hurtful and faux-patient and faux-hurt words followed, before two’s patience wore out, she slapped one, and the games began.

I have all of this from the custodian that dared cross the line into the “girls’ room” and try to break up the fight, which, having a “spirit of wisdom” (verse 17), he succeeded in doing peacefully (2:14-18) by ducking his head in, announcing that he had voted for Obama, and ducking out as the women stopped to pursue him.

     Unfortunately, his wisdom cost him his job, twice over.

This is the kind of town I live in, redder than blue in a purple state. This all happened before eleven o’clock this morning.

05.04.16