Stock Responses
Too often we think “know thyself” means “finding something we don't like, attributing it to others, and becoming indignant with
them.” – from Uncle Albert’s sentences
More from The Antick's Notebook. Responses
for any occasion . . . to anyone, climbing up onto any platform (real or
imagined). Most of these should be inflected with
positive hesitation, as if they expressed agreement yet were uncertainly true. (Exceptions are noted.) Memorize these and you’ll never be at a loss
for words, assuming you’re willing to do with fewer than ten.
o
As
if run through with a bayonet.
o An attack of gas can be . . . . [Shrug
and wince.]
o
I
had a cat like that.
o
That
was 47, right?
o
Remember
horehounds.
o
Armageddon.
(These two
can be phrased either as a nostalgic or hopeful desire/question [as in “Remember when Aunt Mary . . . ?”] or as a call to arms [as in “Remember the Alamo!”])
Try it. Here are statements from yesterday’s news and opinion pages. Remember there is no incorrect or correct response, only one chosen at random. My dog's choices are below.
***
"Gov.
Jindal is defending the liberties of citizens and the constitutional structure
intended to protect those liberties." - Emmett McGroarty, education director of the
Washington-based American Principles Project
That was 47, right?
"You
can't defame someone with an opinion in Ohio. You can't control an idea. The
way we control ideas is in the marketplace of ideas, not in a court." –
Megan Lovett, attorney at the Pittsburgh-based nonprofit, Fair Shake
Environmental Legal Services
Remember horehounds?
“The House will continue to focus on solutions that
help get people back to work, lower costs at home, and restore opportunity for
all.” - John Boehner (R, Ohio)
I had a cat like that.
"The Census Bureau released a report the other day on Americans’ wealth that seemed full of bad news. Middle-class wealth was down, and inequality — the gap between the top and everyone else — was up. Stereotypes seem confirmed. But wait. Buried in the bad news was some astonishing good news: The elderly defied trends and got wealthier." - Robert Samuelson,
Washington Post columnist.
An attack of gas . . . [Wince and shrug.]
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